Hi to all,
Hope you guys are enjoying the first few weeks of school, and of course have enjoyed OBS as much as the rest did. Thought of bringing life to this dead blog by posting this email conversation.
Wed-developer Amir Saffar is applying for a job under Mike Platts. There is not a need to read the first email if you do not want to, because it is quite long. This is funny in the sense of how even emails for applications can turn a bit vulgar and manners just degenerating as the replies were forwarded to one another.
So behold, the job-application email conversation:
From: Amir Saffar
Sent: 02 December 2006 01:22
To: Amir Saffar
Subject: multimediator/web designer position
Amir Saffar
To Whom It May Concern:
I am a web developer/designer with experience in designing corporate, commercial, retail, and business web systems. With more than 6 years experience designing Internet/multimedia systems professionally in a production environment, I could be a valuable asset to your web design and multimedia team.
Managing projects, task delegation, and client relations have been necessary skills at my previous employment positions. These have always been tasks that I excel at and enjoy.
My experience in web site consultation critiquing usability, functionality, aesthetics, and search engine placement can help clients with their existing web content by introducing them to innovative and cost-effective solutions.
My enthusiasm, creativity, communication skills and ability to work without supervision are my strong points. I have extensive design experience using Flash, Dreamweaver, HTML, CSS, VB, C#, SQL, Photoshop, Illustrator, QuarkXPress, 3dsMax, and other programs. I would be able to create a dynamic company presence for you on the Internet.
I am currently on vacation for two months in the region. Since I have a Canadian passport, traveling to the UAE would not be an issue for me at all. I also have to mention that since I have lived in a multicultural country and because of my background, I have been trained to work with people who have different cultures and backgrounds. Therefore I hope my experience in this field could be a valuable asset to your company.
I would welcome an opportunity to discuss my qualifications and experience in greater detail. I am available for an interview at your convenience.
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Mike Platts wrote:
Hi Amir
Thanks for sending us your CV - we’d certainly be interested in speaking with you. Just to clarify, are you planning to visit Dubai during your vacation? If not, perhaps we can arrange to speak over the phone.
Regards,
Mike Platts
Creative Partner, North55 Dubai
——————————————–
From: Amir Saffar
Sent: 11 December 2006 00:18
To: Mike Platts
Subject: RE: hi again
Hi again,
I guess people work for free in Dubai. Am I correct!??
take care
Amir
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Mike Platts wrote:
Sorry, you’ve completely lost me there…how did I imply that people ‘work for free’ in Dubai?
Mike.
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From: Amir Saffar
To: Mike Platts
Sent: Friday, December 15, 2006 9:11 PM
Subject: RE: hi again
it’s very simple Mike. You are interested in my profile and i wanted to know how much you were able to pay. no response means: you either can’t pay that much,
or you only hire indians and pakistanis who don’t ask for a good salary.
but dude, i am neither indian or paki and i have never worked for less than
2000 usd/month. You got it now!?
Amir
——————————————–
Mike Platts wrote:
Jesus, that’s some chip you’ve got on your shoulder there pal. Before the email I received on 11th December, I’d only gotten one from you - the first, which included your CV. As far as I can see, it didn’t mention money. If you sent another after that, then sorry, but I didn’t get it, which is why I didn’t reply.
Anyway, it’s all worked out well. I wouldn’t want a bigotted arsehole like you working with us, and I’m sure that the Indians and Pakis who work at North55 - most of whom earn more than US$2,000 a month, some by a factor of three - are glad that they won’t have to put up with your small-minded bullshit either. The Brits, South Africans and Canadians will probably be pretty cock-a-hoop too.
Best of luck finding a job in Dubai - I’m sure you’ll get exactly the kind of position you deserve.
Cheers,
Mike
——————————————–
From: Amir Saffar
To: Mike Platts
Sent: Saturday, December 16, 2006 10:39 PM
Subject: got it?
i’m sending this e-mail twice. i wanna make sure you get it this time!!
2000 USD/month is a joke bro. I got paid that much when I graduated from College/without any exp.
I’m pretty sure most of you guys work at coffee shops when you finish your work at the studio.
What doesn’t make sense to me is, why would a guy from N America or Europe want to work for that amount. Perhaps you’ve had a low paid job back home and you are satisfied with 2000 USD! weren’t you a cleaner/or a security guard…Mike!?
——————————————–
From: Mike Platts
To: Amir Saffar
Sent: Sunday, December 17, 2006 1:41 AM
Subject: Fw: got it?
You really are an irritating little troll aren’t you? You can barely write English, and you seem to have a problem reading it too. So I’ll break it down for you: not. wanted. here.
Now fuck off.
All the best,
Mike.
PS - I’ve taking the liberty of copying some of my colleagues in the industry here, just in case they too should have the misfortune of hearing from you. I’m sure they’d be kind enough to forward it on to their pals, too, and with any luck you’ll be back fucking moose in time for Christmas. (Oh, and by the way, if you’re such hot shit, why the reluctance to include a link to any of your work in your CV? So you’ve got six years’ experience - big deal. You don’t seem to have been able to hold down a job for too long - or were they short-term cleaner/security guard contracts?)
———————————————–
From: Amir Saffar
To: Mike Platts
Sent: Sunday, December 17, 2006 11:06 AM
Subject: Re:
by the way,
Mike you were either a
1. Security Guard
2. Cleaner
3. On Welfare
4. had a criminal background, so you couldn’t get a job back home
5. a bad designer who never worked for a real company. One of those guys who is a pain in the ass in the production team.
who knows, maybe one day you’ll be working for people like me if you ever decide to return to Europe or N America. * I guess would lose the job within 3 months.
good luck Mike.
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[Mike] wrote:
Congratulations - you’re famous:
http://www.chrisdiclerico.com/2006/12/17/how-not-to-get-a-job/
http://www.flipblogspot.com/2006/12/17/amir-saffar-and-north55
Much Love,
Mike.
———————————————-
From Amir Saffar:
Don’t you really have anything else to do, other than forwording useless e-mails to other people and writting a blog. Dude, if you work at a pro company, you don’t even have time to drink coffee. you are not a pro!! that’s it. and your e-mails are going to the garbage bin from now.
take care
4:24 AM
